Today I was a bit down. I honestly don't know what I did to deserve the way I'm being treated. I suppose you don't neccessarily get everything you deserve. Things really do happen for a reason and when one chapter in your life ends, another begins. I hold this to my heart dearly. The optimistic way of looking at life helps pull you through hard times. Sure, it's much easier to sit and sulk, but how long can you do that for? I spent most of today weeping and slugging around and I feel like I accomplished nothing! I must change that tomorrow for it is a new day and with a new day comes new beginnings of some things great. I have this overwhelming feeling within me. I can't quite tell if it's to one specific emotion. Happiness is one. That is a fact. I'm in love but I feel a bit empty. This is the first man that I've been able to speak so freely and intimate with. There's days where I just want to snuggle and watch a movie with him but he's all the way in Las Vegas while I'm here in Hawaii. It's a bit crushing yet remarkable how one may be thousands of miles away yet make you feel so alive as if they were right next to you. I believe that if I were to marry anyone, it would be him. Charming is simply an understatement. I wish I could tell him thank you; how I see him to be perfect in each and every way his flaws allow him to be; how upon seeing him, I would hug him and not let go. Hopefully, I will have this opportunity do to this in person sometime soon.
Until then, this is dedicated to the boy whose smile warms my lonely soul:
My heart has a special beat for you. <3
